Last friday didn’t start all so well. I did not receive the call I was so eagerly waiting for, however, it would end up in a good note after a lousy start of the day. As the saying goes, to wait is to worry and that’s exactly what I did all week waiting for a phone call that never materialized (it will, eventually) so I could not help but feeling a bit sad. Normally, my wife would be home by the time I get back from work and I would then tell her how bad my day was (again) and in a few minutes the sorrows will magically go away once she puts my feet back on the ground, however, given our temporary long distance relationship, I opted for the second best option and headed to the local club where my favourite Beatles tribute band was going to play that night and, I must admit, they did shy the ghosts away.
Let me start by describing local clubs in Australia as places where adults go for their entertainment, be it in the shape of drinks, dinner, pokies, free shows or just to hang out with friends and family. Interestingly, their ages range from early 20s to late 80’s and the median is normally around 50. This is what my wife calls a safe place for me to hang out to avoid temptations, nonetheless, this doesn’t mean I didn’t have a lot of fun. The tables are long and set up like a tavern, with the drinks bar inside the function room and a dance floor next to the stage. After I got my cold golden syrup, I returned to my seat in the table closest to the stage and I found I had some new company: two really delightful women aged 82 and 76. I could only admire them just for being there and so I told them. They were cheerful and excited. They told me they have been friends for a long time since they met at Tai Chi (a Chinese Martial Art practiced for health benefits) in the local park and when I inquired them about their secret for longevity one of them told me she didn’t know it yet and that she hopes to live many more years before she considers herself old enough to answer that question. I thought the secret was right there: never think you are too old for anything, age is in your mind.
A few minutes after that first lesson of the night the show started and I was ready to enjoy a great evening. As “The Beatels” played the first notes, I had the feeling that some of the answers I was looking for that night may have been in those catchy lyrics so I sat back comfortably in my chair; fine-tuned my ears and opened my mind to try to decrypt those messages. The first song was “I saw her standing there” and the first image that came to mind was the day I met Pato, my wife, “…and the way she looked, was way beyond compare. So how could I dance with another, when I saw her standing there…” We didn’t actually dance on the first date but I knew that she was way beyond compare and it was love at first sight. The band continued with “Please please me”, “Love me do” and “…listen, do you wanna know a secret? do you promise not to tell? let me whisper in your ear: I'm in love with you…”. That lovely secret was followed by one of my all times fav from the fab4: “I'll follow the sun”. It was penned by George Harrison and it’s one hell of a break up song with such a soft melody that ends up being uplifting in the sadness, hard to explain.
For some reason, these songs were telling parts of my life, specially when “…I pretend that I'm kissing, the lips that I am missing and I hope that my dreams will come true..” or “..love you every day girl, always on my mind. One thing I can say girl, love you all the time. Hold me, love me, hold me, love me, eight days a week…” then, right after that, came the description I made on the first paragraph, but in the words of Lennon & McCartney the loved one is actually home waiting for him after work: “It's been a hard day's night, and I been working like a dog. It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log. But when I get home to you, I'll find the things that you do, will make me feel alright…”. By that time I was calling for “…Help! I need somebody. But not just anybody. Help me get my feet back on the ground…” and then the help came in the form of another favorite of mine to remind me how “…my life has changed in oh so many ways, my independence seems to vanish in the haze…” as “…yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away, now they look like they are here to stay”.
I was again feeling a “nowhere man” in a “yellow submarine”, sitting in my nowhere land and making all my nowhere plans for nobody until I heard that “there are places I'll remember all my life, though some have changed. Some forever not for better, some have gone and some remain. All these places have their moments, with lovers and friends I still can recall, some are dead and some are living. In my life I've loved them all…” now my feet were landing back on the ground again and Buenos Aires was all over me. How could they sing so accurately about a place they've never been?
“The magical mystery tour” was waiting to take me away to “Penny Lane” which was in my ears and in my eyes, beneath the blue suburban skies. Santa Clara del Mar being my Penny Lane, of course. And then again, the lesson from my companion in Macca's own words: “there's nothing you can do that can't be done. Nothing you can sing that can't be sung. Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game. It's easy”. Learn how to play the game; second lesson of the night. When I think of The Beatles I find it hard to imagine the real dimension of their success but I noticed a consistent message through their albums, such us when “Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play, they've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile”, which ties up the two lessons together very nicely: age is in your mind and learn how to play the game!
Talking about age, what could be best than thinking how would things be “when I am 64”: loosing my hair (started earlier, I'm afraid); sending valentines; birthday greetings bottle of wine (or mending a fuse) but more importantly I guess is “will you still need me when I am 64?”
I think it will be easier “with a little help from my friends” as “obladi oblada, life goes on, bro” and even when we “say we want a revolution, well you know, we all want to change the world” so we’d better “come together” because “I know you, you know me. One thing I can tell you is you got to be free”.
“Something in the way she moves attracts me like no other lover, something in the way she knows and all I have to do is think of her”, and by thinking of HER I feel that “here it comes the sun” after it's been a long cold lonely winter, it feels like years since it’s been here. Here comes the sun”. Soon we’ll be together again “little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting…” and “…I got arms that long to hold you, and keep you by my side. I got lips that long to kiss you, and keep you satisfied…”.Needless to say that “I’m in love with her and I feel fine”.
I think it is, after all, time to “get back”, “my mother's waiting wearing her high-heel shoes and her low-neck sweater. Get back, get back. Get back to where you once belonged” but “I know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be. The way things are going, they're going to crucify me”. I need to “take a sad song and make it better. At the end of the show, I went home with more answers than I had questions for. The band, the performance, the company, the lyrics, the melodies, all came together at the right moment and that’s what I love about music. It can make the sun shine through the heaviest rain if you let it into your heart,then, and only then, you can start to make it better.
Showing posts with label english. Show all posts
Showing posts with label english. Show all posts
10 August, 2010
16 July, 2010
Destiny versus coincidences
Among many things and ideas spinning in my head in the last few weeks was the idea of fate versus coincidences. I do not believe in destiny as something that is written in advance somewhere (no one really knows where) and is going to happen as such; not for a moment, not at any level; individually; globally; to a country or football team or anyone else and, moreover, I do not believe in luck and superstitions mainly because they have no scientific proof and are contrary to reason and, secondly, because people who do believe in them do not inspire me, however (and now comes the positive part of this blog entry), I do believe in coincidences, most of which are simple or trivial and only a very few I like to call “specials”.
In both these cases, there is no force of nature behind them to make these incidents occur, they just happen because we are millions of people in the planet and, of course, our paths will frequently cross mostly indifferently but some others not so much so, this depends on the observer of such event (for example, if a tree falls in the middle of the most remote forest, does it make any noise? Well, it depends on someone being there to hear it or not).
I cannot believe, for example, that my life is written somewhere in advance, the mere idea of this would be so boring that it would be unbearable to live a life following the steps already set by an alleged higher power of destiny, even if we don’t know what the next step would be.
This completely underestimates the intelligence of people and sails against the idea that life is built step by step, minute by minute and, for better or for worse, we are all making decisions that take us one way or another, drifting away on the sea of life. There is no better journey than the other, in order to know that we would have to live all the lives and only then be able to compare which one is best, therefore, I believe that what we must focus on is in finding the best possible way for our own life.
Coincidences are basic structures of the road we take in life but, as well as a pile of bricks and mortar do not constitute a home, a list of random repetitions does not make one's life.
However, it is true that most of the coincidences in life will go unnoticed so not paying attention to them is like discarding old bricks that will not be part of a house.
Obviously, it is highly probable that sometimes the improbable will happen (see Murphy's law if you don’t believe me), but for most of life events estimating the probability of coincidences is extremely vague due to the difficulties in repeating the circumstances that led to those coincidences in the first place. For example, there was that person leaving home for work and on a certain day he met a woman at the bus stop to whom he fell in love with and, in time, formed a happy family with children, completely oblivious of the fact that on that very same morning that woman left her home later than usual because it was the first time she fell asleep since her alarm didn’t go off. That’s what I call a special coincidence, one of those events that will be key in our journey through life.
Life is nothing but something finite, we are born and we die and maybe the only way out of this finitude is through love. I believe that love is the opposite to death, love is present at the beginning and at the end of life; love prevails far beyond death in the remembrance and feelings of our loved ones or in the things we do that will transcend our lives.
Life and love are limits, but what are these limits exactly telling us? They are boundaries of the road; they also are protective enclosures; containers that act as referential frameworks in life
I do not see a limit as an end in itself but rather as a tool for achieving the best possible way to create that desired journey in our lives. As the Argentinian writer Jaime Barylko wrote in his magnificent book ‘The children and the limits’, “a road without speed limits or demarcation lines and lanes would be a total chaos which would hardly make a pleasant ride and perhaps impossible to reach any destination”.
When there are limits we are free to act and we can choose and even if we want to, we can leave the road as in order to get out of a place you need to first define that place.
The demarcations on the asphalt alone are not the road, the actual road is between them and so we can choose the pace; the direction; the speed; where to head to or come from; when and how and, if you want to stop moving, you just stand still! This is how we know what goes in or out of those limits and those limits are nothing more (and nothing less) than our personal values.
The challenge is building our road in life according to our values; taking precious time to pay close attention to those very few but very important special coincidences; hearing all the bells and especially following our hearts. There is a song from the Argentinian rock band La Renga that says that “the heart has reasons that reason itself will never understand” and then it goes on to say “wherever I go, I always go to seek what is mine, because the world ends in a circle and the end is where I departed".
That is our freedom and we have it because we have values. I personally look forward to continue traveling through my journey with my three angels; they make the ride ever more beautiful and worthy, with new challenges every day and renewed hope that love will always prevail.
Diego, July 2010
In both these cases, there is no force of nature behind them to make these incidents occur, they just happen because we are millions of people in the planet and, of course, our paths will frequently cross mostly indifferently but some others not so much so, this depends on the observer of such event (for example, if a tree falls in the middle of the most remote forest, does it make any noise? Well, it depends on someone being there to hear it or not).
I cannot believe, for example, that my life is written somewhere in advance, the mere idea of this would be so boring that it would be unbearable to live a life following the steps already set by an alleged higher power of destiny, even if we don’t know what the next step would be.
This completely underestimates the intelligence of people and sails against the idea that life is built step by step, minute by minute and, for better or for worse, we are all making decisions that take us one way or another, drifting away on the sea of life. There is no better journey than the other, in order to know that we would have to live all the lives and only then be able to compare which one is best, therefore, I believe that what we must focus on is in finding the best possible way for our own life.
Coincidences are basic structures of the road we take in life but, as well as a pile of bricks and mortar do not constitute a home, a list of random repetitions does not make one's life.
However, it is true that most of the coincidences in life will go unnoticed so not paying attention to them is like discarding old bricks that will not be part of a house.
Obviously, it is highly probable that sometimes the improbable will happen (see Murphy's law if you don’t believe me), but for most of life events estimating the probability of coincidences is extremely vague due to the difficulties in repeating the circumstances that led to those coincidences in the first place. For example, there was that person leaving home for work and on a certain day he met a woman at the bus stop to whom he fell in love with and, in time, formed a happy family with children, completely oblivious of the fact that on that very same morning that woman left her home later than usual because it was the first time she fell asleep since her alarm didn’t go off. That’s what I call a special coincidence, one of those events that will be key in our journey through life.
Life is nothing but something finite, we are born and we die and maybe the only way out of this finitude is through love. I believe that love is the opposite to death, love is present at the beginning and at the end of life; love prevails far beyond death in the remembrance and feelings of our loved ones or in the things we do that will transcend our lives.
Life and love are limits, but what are these limits exactly telling us? They are boundaries of the road; they also are protective enclosures; containers that act as referential frameworks in life
I do not see a limit as an end in itself but rather as a tool for achieving the best possible way to create that desired journey in our lives. As the Argentinian writer Jaime Barylko wrote in his magnificent book ‘The children and the limits’, “a road without speed limits or demarcation lines and lanes would be a total chaos which would hardly make a pleasant ride and perhaps impossible to reach any destination”.
When there are limits we are free to act and we can choose and even if we want to, we can leave the road as in order to get out of a place you need to first define that place.
The demarcations on the asphalt alone are not the road, the actual road is between them and so we can choose the pace; the direction; the speed; where to head to or come from; when and how and, if you want to stop moving, you just stand still! This is how we know what goes in or out of those limits and those limits are nothing more (and nothing less) than our personal values.
The challenge is building our road in life according to our values; taking precious time to pay close attention to those very few but very important special coincidences; hearing all the bells and especially following our hearts. There is a song from the Argentinian rock band La Renga that says that “the heart has reasons that reason itself will never understand” and then it goes on to say “wherever I go, I always go to seek what is mine, because the world ends in a circle and the end is where I departed".
That is our freedom and we have it because we have values. I personally look forward to continue traveling through my journey with my three angels; they make the ride ever more beautiful and worthy, with new challenges every day and renewed hope that love will always prevail.
Diego, July 2010